Hebrews 4:12-13 New International Version (NIV)
For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart. 13 Nothing in all creation is hidden from God’s sight. Everything is uncovered and laid bare before the eyes of him to whom we must give account.
Can good come from bad situations of life? Can God really help the brokenhearted and learn how to breathe again? Why did this happen to me? Where is God? All questions that ran through a 18 year old brain and only anger filled my soul. My dad was gone, my dad would never walked me down the isle if I got married or see my children or grandchildren. My dad was gone forever and people say that he lives in my heart, but I can't touch him. I can't hug him and I've learned to live in that new normal since I was 18. It was after listening to my mom cry to die that brought me to help me. I thought maybe church would help and I took her there. It was there I heard a story of another young woman who lost her dad at 18. Her story, her determination and joy of living got my attention. I listen closely and I surrendered my heart to God over time. I needed a new thought pattern and I needed to feel God inside of me, but wasn't sure how. It began a process of change and yes, it took time. It continues to take time because there are days I just miss my dad.
Job 11:13-15 Contemporary English Version (CEV)
Surrender Your Heart to God
13 Surrender your heart to God,
turn to him in prayer,
14 and give up your sins--
even those you do in secret.
15 Then you won’t be ashamed;
you will be confident
MY LIFE ~
I have sacrifices things in life for my family. I cry more often than anyone knows. It's in the midnight hour that I call out to God and he hears me. He knows my heart and it's one of good intentions. Not everyone understands me because some have asked what my motive is. My motive is that I love God with all my heart and I want to live kindness. I want to share his story with others and my story too. Behind the scenes of my life are people who prayed and continue to pray for me. Behind the scenes are moments of crying and heartbreak still. I see things I never wanted to see and I've lived through things that I thought would break me down. God is able and I believe that. God is able and I've seen that. Nobody knows your story but God.
I've been judged wrongly by people. I took on their sentences of life when I should not have. I am not who some people say I am but I am everything that God says I am. I am a strong woman of faith, but even the strong needed family and friends. Even the strong needs your prayers. You can't see what goes on behind the scenes of life, but God can. He knows the intend of your heart and will give you the desires of your heart. Some choices we make, does affect the outcome of life. We must plan for our future and hold onto the truth of God. We must live in today and give praise for all we do have in life. Life is short and we might only have today to spread hope to others.
The word (BIBLE) is our new beginning in life. We have all sinned but God forgives. Never forget that you make a difference in this life. Someone watches you and maybe wants to be you, but would they wanted to walk through all your test of life? You know that those things you never told anyone and the things that goes through your own brain? No, we should want to be us, The God who created us individually and on purpose! You are unique and designed for greater. Let nothing stop your faith or your trust in God. God is still a miracle worker of things.
MY LIFE TODAY ~
I have been married for 41 years. I knew him 4 years before that. I met him at church after my dad died. He became a friend and only God knew the next steps. We have two amazing kids who are now adults with their children. Grandparents and we are retired. I have gone to Hillside Christian Church for over 17 years now and found my place in God. I helped in children's ministry and part of the Women's Sisterhood team. My husband and I both volunteer at our granddaughters school. Our lives are used by God and we know it. We have been through the loss of many things in life. Hurt in churches prior to Hillside and I never wanted to go back. Going back to church, brought healing to our hearts, joy to our souls and seeing how God does have healthy churches. Determination to do the right thing and share hope with others. Only God knows you and only God can restore you. I hope this message brings hope to you this day. Never let one or two voices stop you from going to church or living in freedom of God's word. His word is truth and people make mistakes. Let it go and let God bring you to good places too. My story is one of hope and new beginnings. Had I not said yes to God, I wouldn't be writing you, sharing live with great people and making new friends at Hillside, Donaldway School, so much more.
My prayers continue for you, your family and friends.