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40 years ago ~

7/20/2017

1 Comment

 
Picture
AUGUST 13, 1977 ~ Terry and I got married 

We met in 1973 and the journey continues
            WE ONLY JUST BEGUN 

Please don't let my happy picture wish you were me.  It was 1973 when my dad died suddenly with a heart attack and I was 18 years old.  My mother was in her early 40's and wanted to die too.  My brother (Ronnie) and I, listen to her cry and scream out wishing she would die at night.  My nerves got the best of me and I ended up in Emergency.  I was put on nerve pills and didn't know how to deal with my dad's death or my mom who wanted to die.  I was mad at God and church people.  I heard words from them inside my house and I never wanted to attend a church in my life.  I did not know Terry at this point of life.  I had already graduated school and it was about two weeks when my dad would have a heart attack.  

My dad has heard a visiting preacher speak about loving God.  If you really love God, you would give up your medication. What?  This was crazy but my dad was a new christian and truly loved God.  He felt he would trust God because of this man's word and it wasn't the right word. My dad was diabetic and took shots.  He had a suddenly heart attack after stopping his shots and died.  Anger filled our home and that began change in 1973.  

Let's move forward about 5 months.  I had started college months ago and had a breathe of life again.  I wanted to help my mom get out of her sorrows.  I had thought if I took her to this church she used to attend with my dad, maybe she would get better.  Maybe her God would help her.  I went angry and broken inside, but I took her. I look back now and wonder why I would have taken her to a church that allowed wrong teaching, but I did.   It was there that I heard a little boy was going to preach that night.  What?  A kid who preaches?  Little did I know that he was the same age as me.  I took my mom back and heard the message.  God begun a work unknown to me inside my heart.   Life would move forward and I would hear a message from a young woman who spoke on her dad's death.  She had prayed her dad would be ok and guess what?  He was okay in heaven.  She continues to speak and my heart began to take it all in. Words of life from a broken young women and she had no clue about my broken heart. God started something that day inside of me and I couldn't explain it.  

Through the hardest thing of my life, God brought me Terry.  A person who would stand by me through 40 plus years in all times. We have struggled and had hardships.  We have lost it all and begun again. We lost our house, a car, a dog and my brother in less than one year.  My brother died Christmas day with cancer at the age of 37. I was 32 years old when that happened.  We have almost ended our marriage and fought to victory.  Marriage can be hard work and a challenge of matching two lives over the years.  We change as individuals and grown from our own mistakes in life. I am not who I was at 22 years old and neither is Terry.  We always go back to the date August 13, 1977 and what made us want to be married forever.  We say at times of life, we need to begin again and allow God to mend hurts from each other, plus others who hurt us by words. 

Let's move forward.  I needed Jesus in my life  
John 3:16-19  New International Version (NIV)
For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17 For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18 Whoever believes in him is not condemned,but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because they have not believed in the name of God’s one and only Son. 19 This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but people loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil.

OVER TIME ​~ I did ask Jesus to come into my heart.  I didn't really understand the church thing or God purpose at 18 years old. A friendship had already begun with Terry and I began to like him as a boyfriend.  Could this be the one?  I wasn't sure in the beginning but he always said he was.  He was different and carried his Bible with him.  Over a year later, we found ourselves dating and he understood where I was in life. He taught me how to pray the Lord's prayer and go through things together.  He couldn't understand my pain of loss, because he had never loss anyone at that point.  He had an ear to listen and say, "I'll PRAY".   I saw a young man stay when tears filled my house and anger continues.  He always said that prayer works.  I began to talk to God more and more. 

TWO 18 YEAR OLD KIDS ~ Trying to figure life out continues to be together over 40 years later.  It has been easy times and hard times. It has been smiles and tears.  It has been of great money and no money.  It has been everything I ever wanted and broken dreams.  It has been one day at time and not enough planning for retirement.  It was been births of two beautiful children and now grand children. It has always been GOD!  

We have only just begun became our song of choice in 1973 and continues today. A new day brings new beginnings and we have learn to forgive, plus forget things.  We don't have all the answers but we have promised to grow older together and we continue that. Although, we do not view ourselves as old.  Learning to let go of what we can not change and changing the things we can. It's hasn't been perfect but it sure has been God through it all.  We continue to put our trust and hope in God daily.  Living by example and making mistakes. Learning to share real life with others and not sugar coat a marriage to be perfect, because it's only perfect in God's eyes. He joined us together August 13, 1977 and I'm grateful that Terry forgives me and forgets.  He is also grateful that I forget him and forget.  It takes two who continue to learn together and press forward. 

God has patience with me and understood my heart of anger.  As new beginnings happen, I had to change my own mindset.  I never really had a mentor or someone who helped me figure things out.  I had to do a lot myself and the struggle of knowing what to do was hard at times.  Terry has stuck by me from day one of knowing me.  He said he knew the moment he saw me that I was the one.  When life gets a bit too much, I always go back to the beginning of what brought us together.  It was God and love joined together.  We have overcame a lot of negative things and still press forward.

God also brought me a true friend named June.  She helped me get a job with her after I finished college and we drove back and forth together to Berkeley.  It was in those times that she taught me more about the Bible and life.  She was a bridesmaid in our wedding and continues to be a faithful friend.  This took place after my dad's death too and God continued to bring people into my life.  I found as life pressed forward, we should pray for good friends in our lives. Her husband was also in our wedding and her little boy who is grown now. Such a blessing in our lives. 

This is my story of August 13 over the years.  Thank you for sharing this day with me on August 13, 2017.  If you are waiting on Mr Right or Mrs Right, wait on God.  God's timing is perfect and my story may not be your story, but your story is important. God has a plan for each of us.  I know that I am a bless woman because I've made big mistakes in life.  I am glad for forgiveness and love. 

MARK 10:9
Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate

Wow 40 years has gone by for us and it seems like yesterday we got married.  I find it so important to go back to the reason why, when you get frustrated with one another.  I find it so important to think before I speak and listen to what someone is saying.  Not reading into a situation but living it out the best you can.  I heard it said that a best friend brings out the best in you.  Let yourself be your best friend and let God bring out the best in you! 

My prayers continue for you, your family and friends.  We learn to live at where we are in life and know that God's plan continues.  Live in peace and freedom of mind daily.  I value your time and support  in reading my blog.  God's has a plan and I'm glad we are on this journey together. Happy 40th Anniversary Mr. Terry, I love you! 
​~ Sparkie 

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1 Comment
Shirley Hatton
8/14/2017 07:43:01 pm

Janet this is beautiful and I love you and Terri very muchm

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©Janet Nance
YouDontEvenKnowMinistries
American Canyon, CA